


acceptance

by RazzGamer5



Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: Communication, Drabble, Trans Character(s), a3! part 2 spoilers (skippable), chikacito can be read platonic or romantic, figuring self identity, no beta we die like men, non-binary character(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-23
Updated: 2020-06-23
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:48:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24871057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RazzGamer5/pseuds/RazzGamer5
Summary: In which I self-project on all my kins, and I have many kins. Maybe you'll learn something about me reading this...?Or alternatively:Some residents of Mankai Company, and more, learn that labels are unnecessary.
Relationships: Nanao Taichi & Yukishiro Azuma & Arisugawa Homare, Sakuma Sakuya & Usui Masumi, Settsu Banri & Miyoshi Kazunari, Tangerine & Hyodo Kumon (A3!), Utsuki Chikage & Citron (A3!)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 33





	acceptance

**Author's Note:**

> So there's a lot more stuff I would've put in the tags but I'm horrible with tags so I'll just put it in the end notes I guess. ._.
> 
> Anywho this fic is honestly just me self-projecting on all my kins and kind of just a mess. Read it anyway, and I hope you enjoy!!
> 
> BTW there are some big Act 2 spoil spoils so skip the part that talks about Chikage if you don't want that.

Taichi recalls Autumn Troupe’s second play, Stranger. 

Taichi can remember how he struggled to play a female role. How he always “overexaggerated” it, one could say. And suddenly, it all felt so natural. As if he was actually Zero. Not exactly, Zero “the girl” per se. He just didn’t have to think anymore about the fact that he was playing a certain gender. He could just be, for once. 

Taichi isn’t a girl. He highly doubts that. He doesn’t exactly feel like a boy either. He isn’t sure what he is. He’s just Taichi; isn’t that enough? 

Out of all the people Taichi could go to, he goes to Azuma. When he enters Azuma’s room, Homare is there as well. That’s...fine. Taichi doesn’t mind Homare at all, he’ll just ask the both of them, in any hopes they can help whatever the heck he’s struggling with. Is “struggling” even the right word? It’ll do for now. 

“Azuma-san!”

“Oh? What brings you here?” Azuma shifts over on the bed where Homare and he are sitting, and Taichi takes a seat in between the two. “Mm...A-Azuma-san, Homare-san, do you- do you think that it’s possible to be in between genders?”

“Hm?” Homare goes.

“Like...I don’t know. Are there people out there that maybe aren’t exactly a boy or girl? I don’t know what I’m saying anymore really...but…”

“I mean, I myself don’t really identify as male much.”

“You- You don’t?”

Homare chimes in, “Well, gender is irrelevant, don’t you think? Whether someone is let’s say male or not, does that really matter in the end?”

“Well...I don’t know! That’s why I’m asking you both…”

Azuma chuckles. “Fufu~ People like Homare and I, actually Citron too, we don’t like to label ourselves certain genders. As Homare said, it’s quite irrelevant. There really is no point. We’ll deal with being treated as out biological gender for the sake of staying safe, but if you don’t think you’re quite male or female, that’s valid.” 

Azuma puts a hand on Taichi’s back, and he goes, “Ah, that makes sense! I guess… And Citron? Is he really…?

“Yes, he is just the same as you and I and Homare. Is that a surprise?”

“I mean...kinda?”

“Fufu~ Well, I’ll be off to the mall to buy groceries with Homare now. Off you go~”

“Ah, okay then!”

Sakuya finds himself surrounded by all these people falling in love. There’s Masumi, in love with the director, and Kumon who says he has a crush on Azami. 

Sakuya doesn’t think he’s incapable of falling in love, but then again he isn’t quite sure what he is. There’s so many labels out there: asexual, grey-sexual, pansexual, bisexual, et cetera. Sakuya doesn’t know what he’s supposed to be and what labels would work for him. 

Sakuya should know these things by now, right? But isn’t it also okay not to know? 

It’s Friday, and Sakuya is eating with Masumi at school (after many, many persuasions). 

“Masumi, what uhm- sexuality do you consider yourself as? Or uhm...romantic orientation…” It’s hard for Sakuya to say the whole sentence without blushing, despite almost being eighteen.

He isn’t sure if Masumi is the right person at all to ask this to, but there’s no harm either way.

“Who cares,” is Masumi’s answer. “As long as I love Izumi that’s all that matters.”

“I-Is that so? But Izumi is an...uhm- woman, right? Would that make you straight, bi, or pan? Uhm…”

“Don’t know, don’t care.”

“Huh?”

“Labels are unnecessary.”

“A-Ah…”

That’s all Sakuya needed to hear. Masumi doesn’t and would never understand it, but Sakuya thanks him nonetheless. “Thank you, Masumi-kun!”

“Huh? Weirdo…”

Tangerine is confused, confused as ever, so what does he do?

He phones Mankai Company, hoping there’ll be someone there for him to talk to. As absurd as an idea that is.

“Uhm- Hi? Phis is- Phis is Tangerine.”

“Oh, Tangerine? Hi!! This is Kumon, from Summer Troupe! What’re ya callin’ for?”

“Wh... What does it mean to rike someone?” 

“Rike?? You mean…’What does it mean to like someone’?”

“Yes! That!”

“Well...it’s kinda when you yanno,, think about that certain person-or people I guess-a lot!! Like, a lot a lot!”

“A lot a lot?”

“Yeah! It’s kinda hard to explain…”

“Ph-Phat’s okay… I am just a little confused... I just do not understand what difference romance and platonic love is! And what gender I'm supposed to even like...!”

“Uhhhhh. I think I get what you’re saying? I mean there’s no use trying to figure all that stuff so young anyway. I say just don’t let that stuff get to you! You should just let your heart do what it wants, and if you’re not quite sure of anything at all, well that’s fine too! 

I don’t even know a lot of stuff about myself either but...pssh! Who cares about that, right? Just live your life and discover yourself as you go! Or something... Haha~”

“Oh...you are fight!”

“Fight? Right?”

“Yes, that!”

“Well, guess I am, haha! Ah...Sakyo is calling me so I gotta run now but I hope I could help!”

“Oh yes, good day!”

Banri hasn’t ever cared for things like romance and dating.

That doesn’t stop him from believing he might experience all that stuff one day--though he’d never admit it to anyone but himself. He’s not quite sure what he is. Ace? Aro? Grey-ro? Quoi? What does it matter anyway? That shit’s confusing as hell; Banri sure as heck couldn’t care less for it.

The last person he expects to help him with all the “figuring himself out” shit is Kazunari. And yet.

And yet.

Upon entering Kazunari’s room, Banri hears: “Woah~! Settsuar, what brings you here?”

“I- You know what, nevermind.” 

As Banri immediately turns back, Kazunari grabs him by the arm and goes, “Wait, no! Come back!”

Banri sighs, muttering, “I regret this choice already…”

“Well, what brings you here? You, of all people, are the last one I’d expect to show up here, you need something? Or…”

This is his chance now, right? To get everything out? What exactly is Banri supposed to say anyway. He knows well enough that yeah, labels can go fuck off. That no one needs them anyway, that they’re not a requirement. But still, he finds himself needing something, someone to validate him.

Isn’t that normal as well? To seek validation?

All Banri’s life he’s always been enough anyway, he never had to try for people to validate him, so it never really meant anything to him. Honestly...all the things he did and all the people he pleased, did it ever make him feel valid? No. Never. He can’t recall the last time he ever felt validated.

Well, as nice as Kazunari really is, telling him all this could either completely blow Banri’s shot at finally tasting the validation he’s always wanted, or be the first moment in forever he could ever be absolutely welcome as his raw and natural self.

If Banri doesn’t do this now, he might never. And would he rather blow everything for the sake of having a chance to be accepted? Or just not do it at all, possibly wasting this chance?

“Uh- Settsuar? You there, buddy?” Kazunari waves a hand in front of Banri’s face.

“Y-Yeah yeah…” He swats Kazunari’s hand away and takes a deep breath. “I uh- Got something I wanna tell you.”

“Oh? Of course, man, I got you. Shoot.”

It’s now or never.

Chikage knows familial love well enough already.

That’s what Misha and Hisoka, no, August and December always were to him; family. Keyword: were.

August isn’t gone yet. He never will be. But it’s true that August would never _be_ again. Chikage has already blamed December enough. And he’s honestly guilty for that. At least Chikage doesn’t live every moment of his life thinking that August could be there instead. That every time he smells, hears, or touches something, there could be someone else experiencing all that, someone else that deserves it just as much.

Or does he?

That’s… That is irrelevant. 

Chikage doesn’t think there is any such thing as romantic love. Or sexual attraction really either. People are just blinded by myths and lust. That’s a logical assumption, is it not?

Chikage has had enough thinking for today. He wanders around the Mankai dorms aimlessly for a bit (something he never does, but today is a bit different) and finds himself in front of Sakuya’s room. Sakuya is at school right now.

That means Citron is in there. 

He enters.

“Oh? What brings you here?” Citron says in that eccentric way of his. He speaks in Zahran, as there’s no real use in Japanese with just the two of them. Because of all the time Chikage has spent with Citron, their Zahran exchanges have become more and more easy for him. 

Chikage has improved a lot for Citron. That fact in itself is...quite something. But Chikage really has had enough thinking for today. He’ll just “chill” (as Itaru would say) with Citron to take his mind off things. 

Citron, over time, has become the person (other than Hisoka, Chikage supposes) the only peace in the world for Chikage. He feels at home around him, and that’s, well, saying something.

“Just going to spend some time here, don’t mind me.”

“Oh, alright then! Make yourself comfortable~” Citron shoots Chikage one those warm smiles of his, the type that only Chikage gets to ever see. 

If Chikage is being frank, Citron is probably one of the ones in Mankai (or just in general) that knows him best. And Chikage is completely fine with that. Spending time with Citron is his way to relax for once. He wouldn’t trade those times for anything else in the world.

Except for…

_Starting today, we’re ‘family.’_

Well, Chikage won’t get into that now. 

He walks over to where Citron is laying on the bed, and flops onto Citron’s lap, earning a giggle from him. Citron wraps his arms around Chikage, and Chikage lets his eyes close.

He feels right, everything feels right, and that’s all that matters.

“Settsuar…”

Banri’s nervous, this might be the most nervous he’s ever been. So far, it seems like it’s okay. Or maybe that’s just him trying to reassure himself…? He will be okay.

It’s gonna be fine.

“It’s okay, man!”

“H-Huh?”

“I mean, not gonna lie, I’m pretty much the same! Labels, kinda unnecessary, right? Who needs ‘em! I’m sure there are plenty out there who use them and are happy that way but… Settsuar, my dude, don’t worry yourself about it!”

“Really…”

“Yeah, bro! Seriously, all these labels and whatnot, it’s all really confusing and messes with your brain juice and stuff. Just don’t think about it. Live your life and let your heart do whatever the heck it wants! That’s the type of person you’ve always been, yeah?”

“Ha! Guess so.”

It’s okay.

Banri is okay.

**Author's Note:**

> Aight so, sorry if this ends up being a little long. But.
> 
> This fic is what I wrote in honor of pride month. I basically self-projected on my all my kins (yes I am a kinnie whatever) and every single person mentioned in this fic (except for Hisoka and August) are my kins. Yes I am a Chikage, Banri, and Masumi kinnie. Surprising to anyone that knows me, huh? Very big Chikage kinnie in fact. ANYWHO.
> 
> This fic is honestly a mess and I actually wrote it all in a sitting (which seems impossible esp for someone like me but yes that happened) but I'm still already really attached to it since this is p much the only fic I've ever written entirely for my sake. This fic is for me, so if it doesn't get any attention? Who cares. It'll hurt of course if literally no one reads this but I wrote this just for myself. I do still hope others can enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. I kinda crapped this whole thing out so sorry if it like really sucks.
> 
> I do actually think this fic is very meaningful though. I know this was for my sake, but who's to say there aren't others like me in need of validation? Well I hope this fic does some sort of good for anyone else other than me.
> 
> Sorry for the long end notes, hope you enjoyed!


End file.
